And I didnt really care in the first place.George Carlin, Dont confuse me with those who cling to hope. Because theres no money in that problem. Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. In fact, George Carlin had some pretty interesting things to say about government. His critical thinking shines on stage and opens your eyes to modern-day problems that most folks are oblivious to. Period. Interview with Todd Leopold, edition.cnn.com. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. Heres all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. There is a mistake in the text of this quote. Ever. The only person who is with us our entire life is ourselves. George Carlin, 33. Aw, hes a comedian. I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. George Carlin, 9. George Carlin was one of the most well-known and beloved comedians of all time. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money. Theyve long since bought, and paid for the Senate, the Congress, the State houses, the city halls, they got the judges in their back pockets and they own all the big media companies, so they control just about all of the news and information you get to hear. George Carlin, 63. Its disgusting, man. Every person you look at; you can see the universe in their eyes, if youre really looking.George Carlin, Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die,your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. I hate a group of people with a common purpose. Your cat thinks the dog's an asshole. fetchBids: function() { They own, and control the corporations. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. var ue_sn = "www.goodreads.com"; We cut education, in 50 years, well be so stack with idiots with shitty jobs that we wont have enough money to pay for defense! George Carlin, 85. In this blog post, weve compiled some of his most compelling quotes on the subject for you to consider as well! Inspirational George Carlin Quotes 1. So, I dislike and despise groups of people but I love individuals. Its so fuckin heroic. George Carlin, Most people work just hard enough not to get firedand get paid just enough not to quit. George Carlin, Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. George Carlin, If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre going to have selfish, ignorant leaders. George Carlin, Theres no present. Here is one I would suggest: Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was. Feel free to reach out and connect. The first one is: 'Never believe ANYthing the government says.' George Carlin Believe, Government, Rules To Live By 48 Copy quote Tell people an invisible man in the sky created all things, they believe you. Governments dont want a population capable of critical thinking, they want obedient workers, people just smart enough to run the machines and just dumb enough to passively accept their situation. What do you get at the end of it? He was the second onComedy Centrals list of top 10 American comedians in 2004, posthumously awarded theMark Twain Prize for American Humor in 2008, and ranked second in number on the list of the 50 best stand-up comedians of all time by Rolling Stonemagazine in 2017. [CDATA[ You have owners. War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. return true; Lists. The people are fucked. George Carlin, May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. George Carlin, Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. George Carlin, Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. George Carlin, We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. He loves you and he needs money. I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, There is no I in team. What you should tell them is, Maybe not. "Events.SushiEndpoint": "https://unagi.amazon.com/1/events/com.amazon.csm.csa.prod", The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. He believes that knowledge can change the world and be used to inspire and empower young people to build the life of their dreams. //]]> !function(){function n(n,t){var r=i(n);return t&&(r=r("instance",t)),r}var r=[],c=0,i=function(t){return function(){var n=c++;return r.push([t,[].slice.call(arguments,0),n,{time:Date.now()}]),i(n)}};n._s=r,this.csa=n}(); Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? They never mention that part to us, do they? George Carlin, 50. My advice: just keep movin straight ahead. Laugh until you gasp for breath. George Carlin, 3. //= 2; // retina display Whether you agree with him or not, George Carlins views on government are definitely worth considering. That's the problem." "Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out." " Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity ." That is against their interests. The government doesnt care about you, or your children, or your rights, or your welfare, or your safety. // If holy people are so interested in politics, government, and public policy, let them pay the price of admission like everybody else. If youre born in America you get a front row seat.George Carlin, Dont sweat the petty things and dont pet the sweaty things.George Carlin, If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.George Carlin,Napalm & Silly Putty. Those who decide what news you will or will not hear are paid by, and tolerated purely at the whim of, those who hold economic power. " George Carlin Quotes "Most of the country was founded by slave owners so they could be free. 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Yeah, I know, youre thinking. Weve learned how to make a living but not a life. I mean, life is tough. } If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse. Im talking about the real owners now the real owners. It creates a hostile work environment. George Carlin, 65. If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. var stylesheet = document.createElement("link"); Thats exactly what I want you to think. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. "I have a right, you have no right, we have a right." Folks I hate to spoil your fun, but. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("author", [22782]); function q(c, r) { They should be more vivid. Enjoy! I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. Nobody owns anything. George Carlin Quotes - BrainyQuote. Period. "Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. Carlin, who was known for spewing critical rhetoric against the government, organized religion and big business, first delivered the quote during his 2005 HBO comedy special, Life Is Worth. var gptAdSlots = gptAdSlots || []; Most people with low self-esteem have earned it. George Carlin, 29. Improve yourself, find your inspiration, share with friends, George Carlin (2002). The people are fucked! George Carlin, 80. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.George Carlin,When Will Jesus Bring The Pork Chops? Igor is a SEO specialist, designer, and freelance writer. If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. var node = document.getElementsByTagName("script")[0]; Save the planet? Showing 1-30 of 421 "The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept." George Carlin tags: humor , insanity , lies , lying , self-indulgence , truth 19588 likes Like "The planet is fine. I hate a group of people with a 'common purpose'. Maybe this time itll work. George Carlin, Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointedidealist. George Carlin, Never argue with an idiot. It seems only right. Dont just teach your children to read Teach your children to question what they read, teach them to question everything. Please dont forget to subscribe to ourRSS-feedor followInspirationfeedonTwitter,Google+,andFacebook! g.parentNode.insertBefore(A, g) Famous and remained in the controversies for his dark comedy and the reflections on politics, religions, and social taboo, Carlin is considered one of the most influential comedians of all time. People are wonderful one at a time. They spend billions of dollars every year lobbying, lobbying, to get what they want. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience." - George Carlin 2. You will do things in the name of a group that you would never do on your own. 4994. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place. George Carlin, 31. Life is a zero sum game. George Carlin, 36. Im not sure thats the way to fight discrimination. You know how I define the economic and social classes in this country? "Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it." ~ (George Carlin). Nothing changed.George Carlin, Well, if crime fighters fight crime and firefighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?George Carlin, I think its the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. "Government want to tell you things you can't say because they're against the law, or you can't say this because it's against a regulation, or here's something you can't say because its a.secret; "You can't tell him that because he's not cleared to know that." Government wants to control information and control . American 2023 Inspirationfeed. Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school. George Carlin. Right in the f--in head! ! "ObfuscatedMarketplaceId": "A1PQBFHBHS6YH1" If the parent corporation doesn't want you to know something, it won't be on the news. Authors. All rights reserved. Don't forget to confirm subscription in your email. Dont look for it. There is only a short pause before the next horrifying event. We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. Goalcast is an inspiring community for achievers dedicated to helping you improve all aspects of your life. Hes not a cheese. He was born May 12, 1937, in New York City into an Irish Catholic family, but he rejected the faith. In this article, we present to you some of the famous George Carlin Quotes on Government, Marriage, Love, Life, Religion, Death, Voting, Freedom, Politics and More with their meaning. Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. apstag.init({ He was regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comics of all time. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.George Carlin, I dont have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. // page settings And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid." George Carlin "Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity." George Carlin He made us notice the things we never did before in the form of his humor and this world will forever be grateful for this brilliant mind. The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. I sincerely believe that if you think theres a solution, youre part of the problem. Never argue with an idiot. (function() { The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. George Carlin, 15. Maybe this time itll work. So arrogant. Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? g = p.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; Thats the problem. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) What are your favorite George Carlin quotes? But there is an I in independence, individuality and integrity.George Carlin, Some people see the glass half full. The challenge is to find it. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("sid", "osid.b75ee1b4ab41ae6cecc3e4c769a5b3df"); George Carlin is a Grammy-winning American stand-up comedian, actor, and author. If you burn the flag, youre burning the flag for what you perceive to be the bad things the country has done. It can help you a lot. George Carlin, 8. Theres only the immediate future and the recent past. George Carlin, There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. George Carlin, The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. George Carlin, Honesty may be the best policy, but its important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy. George Carlin. Tax them. if (sourcesToHideBuyFeatures[i] == source) Think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of them are stupider than that. And, let me tell you, theres nothin like it. In this blog post, well take a look at some of Carlins most famous quotes on government. " If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else.